Tuesday, August 13, 2013

大笨蛋

为什么我总是在犯错后才后知后觉,那时补救已经来不及了,不被原谅也是应该的,我这个笨蛋。。。现在才发现我错得多么离谱,下次真的要睁大眼睛看清楚,哪些人值得为他那么做,哪些人不值得为他那么做。这一次,我真的看得清清楚楚,一直以来我觉得值得的东西,原来都是我单方面付出。真的太失望了。原来真的有人会为了自保而编个谎言伤害人家。这种人就是社会上的反社会人格,千万要远离这种人啊!这一路以来对他的伤害,我真的无法想象。我会慢慢的弥补,就算分开了,我也会默默的弥补对你的伤害。这人心险恶的社会,我又上了宝贵的一堂课

Sunday, August 11, 2013

happy holiday

well i think this 4 days holiday is the best holiday for all those office worker :) i saw many people are outing for a trip these few days. so am i. suppose to be. but i am staying at home eventually on today the saturday night was suppose went to the heli lounge bar to enjoy the breath taking sunset on the roof top and then head to the club and enjoy my last clubbing in malaysia before i leave. all is about what i suppose to do tonight. but it all turn to bubbles because of my mom mad of me going out everyday. sigh. they never know how i care about them. what they thought is i am a lazy girl who doesn't like to work, do house work, take care of the lil brother who already 15 years old, doesn't care about the family stuff bla bla bla... i can stay at home because of them, because of i care about their feelings. i can back home directly if they need me to fetch them do things for them if they need me. but they never appreciate. be honest, i never ask money from them since i graduated. i am spending my own money own savings on every single meal, travel, outing, even the art class i have to pay every month. i just dont understand, am i wrong to enjoy my life with my money? what is your problem? just because of the school fees you will pay for me in advance and then you threaten me? well i can tell you that i am a independent girl when i was in high school. after i reach there i will find ways to solve my school fees without your concern. dont worry i wouldn't die there if you didn't give me money. i am a smart girl i know how to survive. if you dont want to take care about me, somebody does.somebody who love me and care about me will help me finish my education. although you thought he is not suit me. but i do. for the first time i can feel that a man sacrified a lot of things for me. the man that changed my life a lot. i love him so much. indeed.
many of my friends do not know why am i dont want to follow them for a trip. those who get pocket money from parents would not know how suffer it is when you have to spend everythings on your own. you have to think how you gonna survive when you left the last 50 bucks but still have 2 weeks more to get your salary. argument exsist when money not enough. but we been through all of it together. we help each other when the others have problem. we are more like a family now.
he made my day all the time when he is beside me 

caption: he is not handsome, he is fat, he looks old, he have a lot of bad habbits, but i love him so much, because nobody is prefect, so am i :)
the man who never drunk, feel safe when go drink with him :)

went DREAMZ BAKERY again. favourite green tea millie crepe 

green tea tiramisu, chocolate mint layer cake
latte, latte art swan
stupid face

like this the most, act cute face haha
hmmm nom nom nom, green tea cake is the best!




end up here today. going to restart my blogger life because i am going to taiwan! yay! stay tune ;)




Saturday, August 3, 2013

兜兜转转,我又回到了原点

一年半了,我才发现,原来我都在转圈圈。刚开始转圈的时候,很幸福很开心,认为这是一条很直的路,我们会走很远很久。可是现在走到最后,才发现原来我又回到原点了。到最后,我还是得一个人,还是为了同样的理由,出去闯荡属于我自己的世界。还是一样没有得到任何人的支持。原来这一年半我所付出的一切都被视为狗屎,我所付出的信任,被他人践踏着。其实我真的是一个很单纯的人,我会为我觉得值得的人付出一切,只要我认为值得。你对我好,我会十倍奉还,你对我不好,我当然也会十倍奉还。事实永远都是难以接受。谎言,更让我无法容忍。我要怎么活在谎言中?我要如何与认为在用善意的谎言来“善待”我的人过下半辈子?这一路以来,我认为为对方付出是应该的,我尽我所能去做,结果我得到的是?谎言。这辈子,我最最最不能容忍的就是第一欺骗,第二不守时。我不希望步我妈妈后尘,每一天活在谎言中。每一次妈妈哭着向我说你爸爸又讲骗话了,他说好要回家的。。。我都会默默的跑去房间掉泪。我切身体会,那是多么的痛心,失望。

有人告诉我,如果你觉得没有爱了,那么就结束吧。爱,当然还存在,只是信任已经不存在。这就是我一直不舍得的原因,因为爱,我相信他会为了我改变。原来到最后,在改变的一直都是我。我好不容易把信任交给你,可是你却把我的信任当成低级品践踏着。难道我那珍贵的信任是随便给人家践踏的吗?我真的受不了,你怎么可以骗我,欺骗一个那么单纯的去信任你的人。。。真的是让我太失望了。。。。我为你掉的泪都可以养一缸鱼了。。。你怎么可以那么对我。。。怎么可以。。。。